Do you ever feel stuck in a cycle of bad relationships—picking the wrong people, ignoring red flags, or staying in situations that leave you drained? Yeah, I’ve been there too. If Mel Robbins’ Let Them Theory had been around years ago, it would’ve saved me so much time and heartache. Now, I’m happily married to the love of my life, but I wish I’d had this advice back then. Today, I’m breaking down what Mel got right about relationships, and then we’re diving DEEP into dating in the next series. Trust me, you don’t want to miss this!
The Core Idea
Here’s the truth: you can’t control others—you can only control how you respond. It’s about letting people show you who they are and then deciding if that works for you. Sounds simple, but it’s harder than it looks.
Think about it: how much time have you spent trying to change someone or waiting for them to change? I used to think, ‘If I just love them enough, they’ll finally step up.’ But here’s the thing: people don’t change because you want them to. They change because they want to. And until then, their actions will always tell you the truth.
Key Takeaway 1: Let Them Show You Who They Are
In relationships, this means paying attention to actions, not words. If they’re not prioritizing you, they’re showing you where you stand in their life. And let’s be real—you can’t force someone to care about you if they don’t.
I once dated someone who ghosted me all the time. Instead of walking away, I made excuses: ‘Maybe he’s busy,’ or ‘Maybe he’s going through something.’ But deep down, I knew the truth. His actions—not my loyalty—were the real story. He wasn’t going to change, and I needed to stop waiting for him to.
When someone shows you who they are, believe them the first time. Don’t wait for them to become the person you hope they’ll be. Their actions are the truth.
Key Takeaway 2: Stop Making Excuses for Bad Behavior
Here’s a hard truth: stop making excuses for people who aren’t treating you right. I used to tell myself, ‘Maybe he’s just bad at communicating,’ or ‘Maybe he’s scared of getting hurt.’ But mixed signals aren’t mixed—they’re a clear sign of disinterest. If it’s confusing, they don’t like you. And if they’re not making an effort, they’re showing you exactly where you stand.
When you stop making excuses, you take back your power. You stop living in denial and start living in reality. If someone truly values you, they’ll make it clear through their actions—not just their words.
Key Takeaway 3: The Power of Letting Go
Here’s the hardest but most important part: letting go. Ending a toxic relationship is freeing. It’s about valuing yourself and walking away from the thing (or person) keeping you from developing into the best version of you.
I’ve stayed in a relationship way too long because I was afraid of being alone. I kept thinking, ‘Maybe if I try harder, it’ll work out.’ But trying to make it work with the wrong person is like cramming your foot into a shoe two sizes too small—it’s painful and pointless. When I finally walked away, it was like a weight lifted off my shoulders, because I finally realized I’d rather be alone than with someone who made me feel small.
Letting go isn’t giving up—it’s taking responsibility for and valuing yourself. Because When you let go of the wrong person, you make room for the right one.
Bottom line: Relationships aren’t about changing someone or waiting for them to change. They’re about seeing people for who they are and then deciding if that works for you. Let them show you who they are. Let them make their choices. And then, you make yours. Because at the end of the day, the most important thing is being honest with yourself about what you deserve—and having the courage to walk away when it’s not enough.
Dating is messy. Which is why I’m launching a series to tackle YOUR biggest dating struggles. We’ll cover red flags, attachment styles, surviving heartbreak, and building healthy relationships. No fluff—just real tools to help you navigate the chaos.
Last Chapter
Mel Robbins gave us the foundation, but now it’s time to go deeper. Relationships are messy, but they don’t have to be confusing. Starting next week, we’ll break down why you keep picking the wrong partners and how to stop. I promise: it’s not just bad luck. There’s a reason we repeat patterns—and once you understand it, you can start making better choices. By the end of this series, you’ll have the tools to spot red flags early, break toxic patterns, and build the kind of relationship you deserve. So, drop your dating questions below, take care, stay curious, and I'll see you next time! 💛
Want to Read Along? Grab Your Books HERE!
The Let Them Theory by Mel Robbins
FYI: Some of the above links may be affiliate links, meaning if you purchase a product or service via these links I may receive a small commission/reward, at no additional charge to you. Thanks for supporting the channel! 😉
FYI: Some of the above links may be affiliate links, meaning if you purchase a product or service via these links I may receive a small commission/reward, at no additional charge to you. Thanks for supporting the channel! 😉
No comments:
Post a Comment